Memories of Murshida Vera
These heartfelt memories have been offered by those who knew Murshida Vera Corda. We'd love to have more stories about her while you who have studied with her are still with us. She was a treasure to so many, and if you have stories to share, please send them to Rahmana Gaile Sickel at sunbird343@gmail.com.
I had the great good fortune to sit at Murshida Vera's feet in 1998, at the first Jamiat Aam ever focused by the women of the Ruhaniat. Friday night over 100 people danced, walked, sang, and prayed downstairs in the Mentorgarten where once Murshid SAM led the first Dances and Walks amidst the oil stains.
I don't remember a word of what Murshida Vera said that night but I remember her beauty -- she glowed from head to toe, radiant with soft crystal-white light, particularly at her heart. Brings tears to my eyes even now...
My favorite Murshida Vera story comes from her visit to Lama after the fire. As the vehicle lumbered up the winding road and approached the blackened swath left by the fire, Murshida said, "Stop! Stop!" The journey was paused, then after a moment, she said, "Do you hear? The trees are singing..."
May we all have ears to hear as she did!
—Farrunnissa Lila Rosa
My friend Annie was going to Mendocino Sufi Camp around 1985. Her husband couldn't go so she asked me if I wanted to attend. Of course I did. I didn't know much about the Sufi's but had briefly met Pir Vilat in 1977 at the The Farm and had lived with one of his mureeds in Ohio in 1981. So off I went to Mendocino. I saw Shabda and asked him what he was doing there. His son and my daughter were in Waldorf School together so I only knew him as a fellow parent. I had no idea he was soon to be the Pir of the order.
As you can see I was naive, but was lovingly guided to the Camp.
I met Murshida Vera and asked for an interview. When I knocked on her trailer door she answered saying, "You have come to get connected." That was my AHA moment. I had been searching all my life but I didn't know what I was searching for: Connection. She turned on the Light.
I got to see Murshida a few more times at her home in California and love listening to her on utube and visiting her grave site at Lama.
—Baraka Brenda Beeley
My most memorable experience with Murshida Vera: It was at Ozark Sufi camp at an all camp class, some time in the early 1980s. While she was talking I remember all of the sudden I noticed that there was Divine Light everywhere I looked in the room! At the same time I was filled with the most all encompassing Love. I think that was the first time I ever experienced ecstasy. Shakur Allah. Thank you Murshida for the beautiful experience & memory.
—Najma Anne Rieke
The favorite memory is from a MWSC Zikr evening, the camp's high point. The hall was like a ship in full sail, moving all into deep, powerful ecstatic places. While Murshida Vera sat in the center, at one point, Mansur Kreps and Allaudin Ottinger stood up behind her and began the "Two-person Turn" roaring "Hu, Hu, Hu Allah!" while Turning around one another. As waves of even greater ecstasy arose, Murshida suddenly slumped forward. People rushed forward to check her vital signs, fearful that it might have been her final Zikr. Half-carried from the room to her cabin, Murshida was heard chastising her helpers, assuring them that she was FINE...that she had simply moved slightly in her chair to adjust her spine when she spontaneously entered samadhi...
First, gratitude to the Midwest Sufi Community who had eyes (and hearts) to recognize Murshida Vera Corda in her magnificent self, and who opened to her and the spiritual transmission she embodied.
I first met her at Mendocino Camp (1977-ish?) where she presented an evening program. New to the ways of Sufis, only in retrospect did I appreciate that a woman teacher appeared to be mostly dissolved in the being of Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan, filling the meeting hall with glorious light and wisdom as she spoke.
Decades later at Midwest Sufi Camp, I laughed uproariously to see devoted mureeds haul Murshida Vera's bathtub to the lakeside in the back of a pick-up truck, and to hear the cook's stories of preparing her daily Cornish game hen. I loved the community's dedication in caring for her.
Once, also at MWSC, Murshida was teaching an all-camp walks class. She appeared to be (1) demonstrating one walk, while (2) reading Murshid SAM's papers on an entirely different walk, at the same time (3) offering spontaneous commentary on yet another walk. Horrified that she might be misleading people, I momentarily veered "off road" into judgment before realizing that the hall was utterly filled with beauty and love...pouring forth through her like the fountain of paradise. Thank you, Murshida for demonstrating the true purpose of Walks practices, beyond names and forms.
In the ‘80s I loved seeing Murshida Vera Corda and Murshida Hayat Stadtlinger, by then definitely elders, sitting on the sidelines at the early Mevlevi Order of America Semas. Part way through, one or the other would fall asleep. The other night I fell asleep on the sidelines of a Zikr here… Tassawuri, Insh'Allah.
—Murshida Kadija Julia Goforth
First, Eternal Gratitude for your drawing together families and community resources in the SEED Schools to support child development, education and parenting instilled with sacred confidence and wisdom. This work was/is huge in its effect on future generations despite that the organizational structures didn't continue.
A STORY: At Midwest Sufi Camp you demonstrated a walk in All Camp Class, while reading an esoteric paper about a different walk, while offering commentary on something else entirely. In my arrogant ignorance, upset that people might be "learning it wrong," I was initially oblivious to the fact that the room's entire atmosphere was permeated with Joy, cascading around us all, transmitted by you, Murshida Vera, like a rosewater fountain in paradise. I learned a great deal from you that day.
At Mendocino Sufi Camp one evening you were scheduled to speak in the main lodge. Only a handful of campers attended, sitting on the floor around you, deeply effaced in the being of Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan as you spoke. I had never experienced a woman in that state before and was inspired as the light of our lineage filled the room and beyond. I only stopped for a minute, enroute to be with the other 200 or so campers in a wild "bhakti fest" in the dining room. Now older, I sometimes regret how often I/we overlooked the magnificent presence you were/are among us and so appreciate those who engaged with you and are preserving your substantial work. Shakur-Allah!
Love & MORE LOVE,
Khadija Go4th
—Murshida Kadija Julia Goforth
Beloved,
Thank You 1001x for keeping beloved Murshida Vera in our consciousness. I remember especially Murshida Vera's reaching out toward the children of the early Ruhaniat and tirelessly showering them and their young parents with wisdom and knowledge, cultivated from her lifetime of travel on the spiritual path and work as an educator. She put her realization into action.
Khadija Goforth
—Murshida Kadija Julia Goforth
Murshida Vera always told us here in the heartland Missouri/Arkansas, where she had many students, that she loved being with us and we felt honored and blessed to have her with us. Even though I never took initiation with her, I have always felt inwardly connected to Murshida to this day.
I know she loved being down at Hamza Roessler's shrine in Columbia, MO and had even contemplated staying/living here several times.
Murshida helped consecrate the Murshid Khabir Heartsong Shrine, in Arkansas, in the 80's and I remember it being a real happening event, surrounded by a special light. http://www.heartsongretreatcenter.com
Murshida graced the Ozark Sufi Camps many times over the years. Sometimes a special bathtub would be brought in for her. There is an interview with Murshida with Saddiq being the interviewer, that took place at the Missouri Ozark Camp. "On Service to the community."
Murshida loved giving long Sufi talks (as many of you know) and we were like her children, just before nap time, to receive the teaching stories. One time as she sat in her white dress, with a box of questions from us on her lap, she started one by one answering our questions. She was sitting in front of the big stone fireplace in the meeting hall...and all the sudden before my eyes...she turned into light...as was gone.
Our late brother Sarmad "Bongo Berry" Bernstein, videotaped some of us women at camp with Murshida as she instructed (tongue and cheek) on Sufi Women Fashion. It was really funny and like a Saturday Night Live Sufi skit. Maybe someday that video might surface? Murshida showed us all the ways to wear our shawls, how to wrap them, how to wear them on our heads, how to "officially" use ones prayer beads and the length they should be...Nuria (my sister) pulled out her bright orange lipstick and Murshida showed us the "proper" way to apply it...so we all put some of this bright orange lipstick on, including Samad...with his ball cap on and this bright orange lipstick, he said, looking right at the camera..."And I was afraid I wasn't going to get an interview!" We all roared with laughter.
One late night at camp once...I can still see her up on the hill, being pushed in the grass in her wheelchair, by three people, after she attended a late night sweat after Zikr...the light and steam followed behind them. Even though they all seemed as if Murshida was driving them in her race car.
—Mudita Sabato
She was my first Sufi guide after I received initiation from Pir Vilayat in 1980. I met her at my first California Sufi Order camp in June 1980 Where I went to find a guide She was the one that stood out to my heart and soul When I went for my interview with her She was so sweet and said to me "I am sorry but I am not taking on any more students" then She took a breathe and said "but i will take you on" We had a deep profound relationship That set me on my beginning path of Sufism and then thru the years it only deepened in so many ways SO on this day Murshida's 102nd Birthday I HONOR her in all ways May her memory and teachings live on forever Bless her soul Aloha
—Solomon Sikirdji
One of my favorite memories ....
(from before I became her mureed:
In Oakland calif. I am guessing a number of you were there I recall seeing Shabda and Wali Ali that night:
It was the Urs of Mevlana and there was Murshida after SEMA in the auditorium "zooming" with her walker around and around the dance floor where the Sema had just been held.
I cherish the name which She gifted me (Shamcher) and keep the name in my heart in a place of most respect bringing it out here with gratitude to honor her life giving presence and Teachings which I'd much rather practice than talk about, nuf said,
—Hamid Francis X. O'Hara
After working in the kitchen at Mendocino one day of camp, I saw some new rigs drive up to camp to see Murshida get out so that I could be one of the first to greet her. She had the sweetest presence that was a balm especially after working hard in the kitchen. Talk about blessed, At NW Sufi Camp the same scene repeated itself - I was the first to greet Murshida when she knew me better thus a more grand big hug then I sat with her after lunch with 5 or so others. Simply the loving grandmother I wished for. Listen to her on video or audio and breathe in the baraka!! Hafiz Leland, Eugene, Oregon
—Hafiz Leland
I was first introduced to Murshida by my dear friend John Brewer 40 years ago. John, or Rahim and I were communal housemates in Eureka, on the north coast of California. We were both closet dervishes when Rahim caught the ecstatic bug from Sufi Dancing. It was contagious and we were soon practicing "Gopala" out in the cow pasture behind the dilapidated farmhouse that we shared with others. This eventually led to gathering weekly with a group of kindred spirits to share in the Dances of Universal Peace. The rest is history for the vibrant Sufi community that continues to thrive there today.
During that period I heard about Murshida through Rahim because of his dual passions in education and spirituality. At the time, she was forming a Seed Center pre-school based on the principles of Pir-o-Murshid Hazrat Inayat Khan. When Rahim's contract as principal at the local pre-school ended, she invited him to help with the development and running of her Center in San Rafael. I was happy for him, but sad that my buddy was leaving. Our bond was strong though, and I made a point of staying in touch by visiting him. That meant being right in the thick of everything as he lived with other mureeds in her khanka in Marin.
All of Rahim's stories about Murshida did not fully prepare me for her. When we finally did meet, she seemed bigger than life, radiating presence and shakti to everyone around. Allah ho akbar! She was a dynamic force to be reckoned with! The frequency in the room rose whenever she entered. Her glance stirred and awakened something in me that had been asleep before she gazed into my eyes. It wasn't long before I asked for initiation by her. At that time, she blessed me with the name Kamaluddin. (Full disclosure: my first reaction was disappointment. I went from a tidy, one syllable Western name to a four syllable one that was challenging to pronounce, and I was clueless about its meaning.)
In hindsight, her name choice for me was not arbitrary. I learned that Kamaluddin was once a renowned scribe and Sufi master. Back then I was an aspiring graphic designer and calligrapher. (Incidentally, I later received Guidance for the Dances' "linked-heart" logo while practicing zikr in Murshid Sam's Mentorgarten in San Francisco). Translated from Farsi, kamal means, "beauty, perfection, excellence, completion, utmost level". On the metaphysical level, it is the balance point between jamal and jalal, Farsi for yin and yang. The state of kamal is non-dualistic. During my initiation Murshida said kamaluddin meant "the perfection of the Faith". She gave me a lot to aspire to! Eventually, I realized Murshida accurately read me in terms of my soul development, and it would take at least the rest of this lifetime to actualize the meaning of my new name.
In that same vein, I once designed a poster to promote a workshop we were hosting for her, and she gave me a spot-on analysis of my personality based on my layout design. I knew she was once a celebrated commercial artist herself, but her enhanced capacity to see and then articulate it was uncanny. That was one of the major attractions I had for Murshida, her no-nonsense feedback and candor. She seemed to be many things to many mureeds, but I found her veracity most refreshing, though blunt at times.
When Ane and I finally gathered the courage to take the leap and get married, I called from my parent's home near San Francisco to ask her to officiate our wedding. The decision to marry there and then was spontaneous as I'd only just requested Ane's hand by the side of the Coast Highway the day before as we were leaving the Mendocino Sufi Camp. Murshida's first response was to suggest that Shabda might be more logistically available than she. No offense to Shabda, but Murshida was my murshida, and also because she successfully counseled us through a critical episode during our courtship. In spite of my serious commitment issues, her initial reluctance catalyzed a clear request on my part that she, and no else, would suffice. She must have felt my earnest sincerity, because she quickly shifted to making arrangements for us to come down to pick her up in Gonzalez where she prepared us a celebratory delicacy of prickly pear cactus. During the ceremony, Murshida's powerfully loving transmission harmonized a vastly diverse gathering of family and friends, transforming my parent's suburban living room into a sacred sanctuary for that afternoon. The memories of Ane as my beautiful bride, as well as my second-generation Japanese parents and my new Jewish in-laws Sufi Dancing together with my spiritual community are priceless.
Finally, Murshida was right again about something else. During our counseling session so many years before, she reflected to us that our relationship had begun where many marriages hope to evolve to. She recognized that we had found a good friend in each other, before we were ever lovers. It's true that Ane and I share a deep love of the Truth. 35 years later, we have come full circle to where we had begun, best friends, but transformed for having made the Journey together.
Thank you dear Murshida, may The Message of God continue to reach far and wide through myself and all of your many loving mureeds. Sleep with the angels.
Al humdu lillah!!!!
Marc Kamaluddin Takaha
January, 2015
—Marc Kamaluddin Takaha
Murshida Vera loved to tell the story of the strong connection she felt to birds from a young age. She said when she was 3 years old she saw tiny little birds taking a dust bath. She felt their delight as they rolled around in the dust, so she quickly stripped off her clothes and joyfully rolled in the dust with them! The birds didn't seem to mind, but her mother did, and took her inside for a bath.
When Murshida Vera Corda was close to death, with people watching over her, someone noticed a hawk which had perched on a branch outside her window and remained there. When she opened her eyes, the person told her a hawk was outside the window and had been there all night, and she said "I know, I called him."
Murshida Vera came to Mendocino Sufi Camp in July, and my teacher told me I should go ask for her blessing, the first time I met her. Once I had an appointment, I went to ask for her blessing. She said with a stern tone and a piercing glance, what is your relationship to the Message of Hazrat Inayat Khan?
A little startled, I said, "I want to help; however I can be of service. "All right. Then I'll give you a blessing." And she smiled and put her hands over my head.
Later when I went to visit, she told me in a whisper, "My name is Haqiqa too, but I would never use it." "Why not?" I asked. She said, "I think I have achieved a certain degree of Mastery, but not That! It means being awake and functioning on all seven levels." "Of course I'm not that aware either," I told her," but I was told to use it as an alarm clock to remind me to wake up and be here."
One day when I was visiting, she said to me, "You should be doing light practices. In the midwest in Kansas City, they are doing a lot of light practices! They are REALLY DOING IT!" Like what? I wondered. She said when you are out for a walk, find something from the mineral kingdom that has sunlight reflecting off of it and breathe in and take it into your heart. And then find a leaf from something in the plant kingdom, like a bush or a tree, and concentrate on the way the sun shines through a leaf or reflects off the leaf. Then as you breathe take it into your heart. You can do this with flowers, too, breathe in the light reflected off a blossom or a petal. Don't try to connect with the whole bush or tree, just one leaf, one petal or one flower. In this way you will connect with the elements and connect in your heart with each plant. And when you connect with flowers, notice whether they are male or female, and feel how that changes their energy.
Love, Haqiqa Hampton
—Haqiqa Hampton
In 1991 I was meeting with Leslie Davenport as part of my Cheragh training. During the conversation Leslie suddenly said, "it just came to me that you should meet Murshida Vera Corda." So, I acted on this and got on an email list. Within a week I was meeting with my guide Saadi Neil Douglas-Klotz. He noted that I "should meet Murshida Vera Corda." I thought this synchronicity spoke loudly that "I should meet Murshida Vera Corda." So, I telephoned Murshida. She asked why I would want to meet with her in that I had a guide. I responded that I really didn't know, but related what both Leslie and Saadi had advised. She asked how long I had been involved with Sufism (which was not long).
She was silent for a moment and then asked if I had a teacher beforehand. I responded that the Rev. Flower A. Newhouse, representing a form of mystical Christianity, had been my teacher for 13 years. Murshida told me that she knew who Flower was, as she, Murshid Samuel Lewis and Flower often left their bodies at night to go help guide Jewish people being killed in concentration camps into spiritual realms. We then set an appointment for me to come to her home in Vallejo, CA.
As she came down the stairs to meet me there was this immediate glance of recognition. Then as she greeted me with a hug, she said "look at how much you've grown." I was back into my ordinary mind and thought "but we do not know one another." She led me upstairs and gave me two-hours of her precious time telling me about her life's work with children and art especially. She told me many things about my past and future. I regret I did not have a recorder as I only remember a couple of things.
I did hear that she also met with my son Raphael a few months after that. I was at a Jamiat Ahm led by Pir Moineddin at the Mentorgarden. Raphael came in and joined us for an hour or two and then left. Later when I came to say good bye to Murshida she said that she "wished she could have seen the two of you together." I have never really known what all this meant. It simply reinforces the fact that many things are occurring that fail to touch our ordinary personalities.
Blessings, Shafiya Majid (Sharon Mijares)
—Shafiya Majid
I'm one of the very few people in Europe who had the privilege of meeting Murshida Vera. Maybe to even call it a meeting is an exaggeration, but I certainly was closely in her presence for a brief period of time.
For three weeks in 1996 I travelled in the US with Saadi, Kamae and two other mureeds, one of our destinations being Lama, where we were to stay for a few days. It was only 3 weeks after the fire and many Americans were visiting at that time. I'll never forget being on the scorched mountain-side with its acrid smell, noticing tiny green shoots already appearing among the charred remains, feeling amazed that certain buildings had been spared, and meeting the Lama inhabitants, some still in a state of shock.
One day several of us were up the mountain, lovingly washing the stones of the blackened maqbara and sweeping the surface of the nearby dance space. Initial washing had already been done by the Lama community, but it needed more attention. Pir Moineddin and Murshid Wali Ali were also there, my first meeting with them both - and this was to be the day when Moineddin would give darshan in the little meditation hut. I recall Murshida Vera coming along the path, where I was standing next to Saadi. Placing his hands on his heart he said something to her, and she paused briefly before moving on. She may also have come to an evening of DUP a few days later, which was held in a nearby small town - I have a sense of her presence at the side of the room. Pir Moineddin was certainly there, dancing.
Love and blessing to you from Edinburgh, Fateah
—Fateah Saunders
I have a lot of fond memories of Murshida Vera Corda, as she often frequented Ozark camps and I was blessed to have spent time with her in my work directing children's programs and working with young mothers. One memory that stands out was when my husband and I were driving her back to the airport in Kansas City following a spring Ozark camp at Lake of the Ozarks. This was in the early 1990s. After about an hour, she explained that her pattern was to stop for frozen yogurt first thing after a retreat, but as we were in the middle of rural Missouri along I-70, the only place we could find that had frozen yogurt was a McDonalds, which was just fine with her. So while eating our frozen yogurt, she said she wanted to stretch her legs so we walked around the back of the parking lot. To her absolute delight, in one corner of the lot, there was a mulberry tree from the yard next door literally dripping with ripe berries. She reached out her arms with the glee of a young child and began picking and gobbling up the ripe berries, in huge handfuls, the juice dripping down her sleeves and all the while reminiscing about eating berries just like this from mulberry trees in her childhood.
Another memory was at an Ozark camp a few years later. The whole camp was at a Universal Worship ceremony, including all the children, maybe 40 of them. The ceremony was going on for a long time, and there was a renowned Tibetan Buddhist monk there and as he was chanting Om Mane Padme Om, and the younger children started getting restless and antsy, and though I hate to admit it, I was feeling a bit antsy myself. I was not on staff directing the kids' program at that camp, but apparently Murshida didn't know that (or didn't care, since to her mind, she thought that I was personally responsible for the children's behavior) so right in the middle of the chanting, she stopped the monk, yelled very loudly, "Aziza! Get those children to behave!" and to the astonishment of everyone, including all the wide-eyed children, I demurely said, "Yes, of course, Murshida". I did not feel in the least bit defensive, just very contrite about being called out, but miraculously, all the children immediately fell silent and still as statues. and she directed the monk to continue chanting. Needless to say, the kids were all very well behaved throughout the entire rest of the ceremony.
Also, at that camp she came up to me one morning and said she saw angels right above my head the night before at zikr, exclaiming how beautiful it was! I felt so special, for about a minute, thinking the angels were seen just above my head, then I overheard her saying exactly the same thing to someone else, and my little bubble of self-importance burst, as obviously the angels were hovering above other people's heads as well. She had such a profound and disarming way of teaching us exactly what was most needed in our lives at any given time.
It was also at that camp that my daughter, five years old at the time, stopped Murshida and the entourage of women protectively hovering around her trying to guide her to her next class, as it wasn't easy to keep her running on time and they were already running late, but my daughter asked Murshida to initiate her. Murshida stopped, and as if she had all the time in the world, turned her full attention and poured her affection and energy onto this child, initiated her with pomp and ceremony, right there on the path, and gave her the name Tajali. It was a precious moment.
—Aziza Patricia Riely